7/31/08

吴淡如的鞋子理论

Yet, another inspiring email I received.

吳淡如說:「年輕的時候真的因為買錯東西,交過很多學費 但是到了現在,我已經能夠認識自己、了解自己知道什麼東西適合自己,所以在下決定的時候就會很清楚、很確定」

吳淡如說:我真的覺得,女人尋找適合的男人 就像是尋找一雙適合的鞋子
在年輕的時候,女人買的往往是最華麗 最能墊高自己高度的鞋子或許是高跟鞋、或許是恨天高 即使難穿也沒關係 因為妳覺得妳自己可以忍耐

但是,如果有一天 妳忍耐到拇指外翻、腳起水泡妳才會發現,鞋子最重要的功能 其實是要陪妳走路而已而走路是要往前走的,不是要站在原地的

婚姻就像找鞋標準一直在變所以,這時候妳就會去找一雙很舒適的 會保護妳的腳的、會陪著妳一起向前走的鞋 而不是去增加你的高度,因為妳就是這個樣子 吳淡如說:「但是這其中也有一個前提就是妳也不能找太醜的鞋 因為如果太醜妳就不會喜歡它」婚姻其實就像每個人在找鞋而已

我發現自己從很年輕的時候到現在 找鞋的人格一直慢慢地在改變因為你已經慢慢接受自己原本的高度 不需要靠鞋子來墊高自己了不過,雖然這個道理聽起來很簡單似乎人人都可以領會 但是,吳淡如也坦承要充分參悟其中的道理,其實不是那麼容易

吳淡如以自己為例,和男朋友Simon鄧 其實在民國八十二年就認識,原先只是朋友 直到最近這一、兩年兩個人才有比較深入的來往那種感覺就像古代的文藝小說中所說的『過盡千帆皆不是』 你(妳)會突然發現好女人(男人)還是在你(妳)的身邊 他(她)也許不是最漂亮的鞋,而是一雙很舒服、能走長久的鞋~

吳淡如說:「我男朋友對我的所有態度 永遠是:『我可以為妳做什麼?』 我後來才覺得 原來這才是人間最稀罕的一種品質」

我真的是後來才發現 像這種從台北載妳到高雄 都叫做『順路』的人 而且他自己有他自己的工作原則、價值觀、人生觀 他不會嫉妒妳的成就,也不會嫉妒妳賺的錢 願意對妳的一切樂觀其成對任何妳想做的各種實驗,永遠都不加置諱因為那不關他的事,這是妳自己的選擇 老實跟你說,這樣的人還真少

正如吳淡如在最近一篇文章中所說的: 「沒有一種幸福的背後不站著一個曾經咬緊牙根的堅定靈魂」吳淡如如今對生活和人生的了悟 其實也經過一番寒風徹骨 從來沒有在人前掉過一滴眼淚的吳淡如在看到弟弟的字跡那一剎那,還是當場哭了起來弟弟的離開對我的人生,其實影響很大即使是我後來跑去奧修社區在做一些 meditation(冥想)的時候,都還是會放聲大哭表示你的那種悲傷的能量還是在漸漸釋放之中弟弟的離開,第一當然是讓我體會到人生無常第二是讓我了解,人生的快樂和不快樂 真的是掌握在自己手中 跟你原先擁有的資質完全無關

我開始看見人有無限可能,我不是只能做這些事情」「就是我一定要把人生過得加倍精采該玩的一定替你去玩; 該看的花該看的動物,都幫你去看;該償還的,我也幫你償還耳邊響起的也正是吳淡如的那句話:
『過盡千帆皆不是』 你(妳)會突然發現好女人(男人)還是在你(妳)的身邊 他(她)也許不是最漂亮的鞋,而是一雙很舒服、能走長久的鞋~

问世间情为何物?

This is a quite meaningful email received from my friend. Try to think about those phrases in white.....

爱的感觉,总是在一开始觉得很甜蜜, 总觉得多一个人陪、多一个人帮你分担, 你终於不再孤单了,至少有一个人想著你、恋著你, 不论做什么事情, 只要能一起,就是好的, 但是慢慢的,随著彼此的认识愈深, 你开始发现了对方的缺点, 於是问题一个接著一个发生, 你开始烦、累,甚至想要逃避, 有人说爱情就像在捡石头, 总想捡到一个适合自己的, 但是你又如何知道什么时候能够捡到呢?

*她适合你,那你又适合她吗? 其实,爱情就像磨石子一样, 或许刚捡到的时候,你不是那么的满意, 但是记住人是有弹性的, 很多事情是可以改变的, 只要你有心、有勇气, 与其到处去捡未知的石头, 还不如好好的将自己已经拥有的石头磨亮磨,你开始磨了吗? 很多人以为是因为感情淡了, 所以人才会变得懒惰。 错! 其实是人先被惰性征服, 所以感情才会变淡的。

*在某个聚餐的场合, 有人提议多吃点虾子对身体好, 这时候有个中年男人忽然说「十年前,当我老婆还是我的女朋友的时候,她说要吃十只虾,我就剥二十只给她! 现在,如果她要我帮她剥虾壳,开玩笑!我连帮她脱衣服都没兴趣了,还剥虾壳咧!*听到了吗?明白了吗? 难怪越来越多人只想要谈一辈子的恋爱,却迟迟不肯走入婚姻。
因为,婚姻容易让人变得懒惰。 如果每个人都 懒得讲话、 懒得倾听、 懒得制造惊喜、 懒得温柔体贴, 那么夫妻或是情人之间, 又怎么会不渐行渐远渐无声呢? 所以请记住: 有活力的爱情, 是需要适度殷勤灌溉的, 谈恋爱,更是不可以偷懒的喔!

*有一对情侣,相约下班後去用餐、逛街,可是女孩因为公司会议而延误了, 当她冒著雨赶到的时候已经迟到了30多分钟, 他的男朋友很不高兴的说: 你每次都这样,现在我甚么心情也没了, 我以後再也不会等你了! 刹那间,女孩终於决堤崩溃了, 她心里在想:或许,他们再也没有未来了
*同样的在同一个地点,另一对情侣也面临同样的处境; 女孩赶到的时候也迟到了半个钟头,他的男朋友说:我想你一定忙坏了吧! 接著他为女孩拭去脸上的雨水,并且脱去外套盖在女孩身上, 此刻,女孩流泪了, 但是流过她脸颊的泪却是温馨的。 你体会到了吗?

*其实爱、恨往往只是在我们的一念之间! 爱不仅要懂得宽容更要及时, 很多事可能只是在於你心境的转变罢了! 懂了吗? 当有个人爱上你,而你也觉得他不错。 那并不代表你会选择他。

*我们总说:我要找一个你很爱很爱的人,才会谈恋爱。 但是当对方问你,怎样才算是很爱很爱的时候, 你可能无法回答他,因为你自己也不知道。*没错,我们总是以为,我们会找到一个自己很爱很爱的人。 可是後来,当我们猛然回首,我们才会发觉自己曾经多么天真。 假如从来没有开始,你怎么知道自己会不会很爱很爱那个人呢? 其实,很爱很爱的感觉,是要在一起经历了许多事情之後才会发现的 或许每个人都希望能够找到自己心目中百分之百的伴侣, 但是你有没有想过在你身边会不会早已经有人默默对你付出很久了,只是你没发 觉而已呢? 所以,还是仔细看看身边的人吧! 他或许已经等你很久喽!

*当你爱一个人的时候,爱到八分绝对刚刚好。 所有的期待和希望都只有七八分;剩下两三分用来爱自己。如果你还继续爱得更多,很可能会给对方沉重的压力,让彼此喘不过气来, 完全丧失了爱情的乐趣。*所以请记住, 喝酒不要超过六分醉, 吃饭不要超过七分饱, 爱一个人不要超过八分 *那天朋友问我:到底该怎么做才算是爱一个人呢? 我笑著跟他说:其实每个人的爱情观都不一样,说对了叫开导,但就怕说错反倒变成误导。那就糟糕了!

*如果你也正在为爱迷惘,或许下面这段话可以给你一些启示: 爱一个人,要了解,也要开解; 要道歉,也要道谢; 要认错,也要改错; 要体贴,也要体谅; 是接受,而不是忍受; 是宽容,而不是纵容; 是支持,而不是支配; 是慰问,而不是质问; 是倾诉,而不是控诉; 是难忘,而不是遗忘; 是彼此交流,而不是凡事交代; 是为对方默默祈求, 而不是向对方诸多要求; 可以浪漫,但不要浪费; 可以随时牵手,但不要随便分手

Pls Turn Off Your Phone in the Cinema

video

7/16/08

Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim arrested

Anwar was being arrested for sodomy allegation around 1pm.

In fact, Anwar already given assurance to show up at the police headquraters at 2pm. Police said they arrested Anwar as they feared he would not show up. They claimed that Anwar supposed to have gone directly to police headquarters immediately after giving his statement to the ACA (Anti-Corruption Agency) in Putrajaya. However, ANwar changed his was heading back to his house in Bukit Segambut.

Honestly, I was shocked with this action by the police. Why they could not arrest Anwar after 2pm ? It's understandable that the police feared Anwar would not show up on time. However, numbers of cops had been positioned around Anwar's house, are they still worry that Anwar is going to escape?

Furthermore, I strongly agreed that the action was 'highly provocative and shocking' as described by DAP adviser Lim Kit Siang. The action will undoubtfully increase political tensions. On Monday (14 July), Police locked down Parliament with roadblocks and massive security to prevent an anticipated rally by supporters of opposition parties. That action had angered the public as they were the group who directly suffered. The inappropriate arrest of Anwar will only further trigger the tensions and angers.

Police had not learnt the lesson 10 years ago. They should show more wisdoms in handling situations like this. If not, the reputation of police force will drop to a lower point.

7/14/08

感情信仰者

感情是可以培养的?
感情是不能勉强的?


相信“感情可以培养”者 - 两个人从素未谋面到相识,从陌生人到朋友,再从朋友到情人。在这相处的过程中,慢慢地发现对方的优点,开始欣赏对方,感情也随之逐渐深厚。。。

相信“感情不能勉强”者 - 不能勉强自己跟一个没感觉的人在一起。。。没感觉就是没感觉。。。


我觉得,后者是属于理想/梦幻中的爱情,而前者则较符合现实中的爱情。。。
一位著名心理学家曾经用四个字解释爱情 - 自作多情
假设A与B,A不经意地向B微笑,而B以为A对他/她有意思,开始对A有感觉。在这时候,B对待A较好,A又以为B喜欢他/她。。。就这样互相以为,A和B就坠入爱河。。。有时候,两个人也因为互相以为,而错失在一起的机会。。。这就是爱情。。

每个人都希望能与自己最爱的人在一起,但现实中并非每个人都有这样的福份。。
两个人要长久在一起,靠的不是感觉,而是感情。。。
感觉反复无常,若不能在天时地利人和的情况下向喜欢的人表白,下一刻感觉就可能消失。。
而感情是随着岁月逐渐深厚。。

那你觉得感情是可以培养的,还是不能勉强的??

7/13/08

Is C. Ronaldo a slave?

Recently, Ronaldo has been linked to a record-breaking transfer to Real Madrid. Ronaldo made known to the world about his desires to play for Real while FIFA president Sepp Blatter labelled Ronaldo as a 'slave'.

In a normal circumstances, a club would tight their key players into long-term contract, in protecting the club's interest. Personally, I think there is nothing wrong by doing unless the pay is very low. Ronaldo is receiving six-digits wages every week and he signed the contract without being forced.

On the other point of view, the fact that Ronaldo wants to play for Real is undeniable. Nothing wrong for a player for wanting to play for his favourite club. It is not good for the player and the club if the player feels uncomfortable at the club and forced to honour his contract.

Thus, IF I were the manager of MU, I would choose to sell Ronaldo for few reasons:
1- He is not loyal to MU anymore, his heart is at Real side.
2- He is highly-valued,MU could have massive transfer budgets after selling him.
3- He is just a world class player, not a LEGEND!! A world class player could change the game
but a LEGEND could change the team.
4- He is having the worst injury in his career, no one can guarantee that he will back to the top
level again after recovering from the injury.
5- Real's players do not welcome the signing of Ronaldo. His presence might destroy the
harmony of Real team.
6- Selling him to Real is better than selling to Chelsea.

7/11/08

Stay or left Malaysia??

Pak Lah confirmed to step down as prime minister in June 2010 and appointed Najib as his successor. At the same time, former PM, Mahathir pour cold water on this deal by saying Najib will not become PM on 2010. Personally, I think this is the best way of transfering power and special credit to Abdullah by putting the country's interests ahead all ( If he really step down as planned).

The lastest developments in Malaysia's political scene are pushing our country into a more unstable stage, which cause frustrations among Malaysians - Anwar's sodomy allegation, Altantuya's case, petrol hike, no-confident vote against Abdullah.........

Anyway, I think the most important thing at the moment is that, DON'T LOSE CONFIDENT!!
Many Malaysians are feeling frustrating on our country's political scene and lose confidents. They think should left Malaysia in the future to secure a better future for themselves. Personally, I dun think this group of people have the right to critise others (especially Malays) by claiming themselves loving the country. Who else are going to develop our country if all Malaysians are leaving the country??!!

"Don't ask what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country",a quote by John F. Kennedy. Everyone has their own demands, at the same time, the country demands for your services. Everyone has their own choices of their own lifes, can try think about above statement when deciding to migrate from our own country....

7/10/08

Results of Poll

What are your first impressions towards politics?

40% Dirty

30% Interesting

30% Ugly

20% Boring

20% None of my business

0% Exciting



Quite surprising results for me since I thought "none of my business" will be the "champions"..haha..maybe majority of "none of my business" supporters were not voting at all...haha...

Personally, I think politics are dirty but interesting. Anyway, I strongly against "none of my business" as politics is the most direct way in influencing our country's development and thus your career.